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Friday, November 13, 2009 |
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Welcome ,
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Good morning, good people of Central
Florida, and of the New York Tri-Sate
Area, mostly.
Only mere days remain until Barry Miller
reaches a major milestone.
The momentous occasion occurs this
coming Monday, November 16th.
HAPPY 50TH BIRTHDAY!
BARRY MILLER
Born November 16, 1959
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Whoopi Goldberg Among 4 New Star to Shine
at Candlelight |
 Candlelight
Processional is a special holiday event
held nightly at the American Gardens
Theatre in Epcot theme park as part of
Holidays Around The World. The event
retells the stirring story of Christmas
with a special celebrity narrator
accompanied by a 50-piece orchestra and
a mass choir.
Candlelight Processional is a terrific
way to get in the Christmas spirit and
to share the magic of the season with
your family and friends. The event has
become an essential family tradition for
many Guests - once you experience it,
you will be inspired to share it every
year with the ones you love.
This unforgettable spectacle is held on
select nights during the holiday season
and, due to its popularity, often fills
up quickly. To ensure you have a seat,
you may participate in one of Disney's
Candlelight Dinner Packages that
includes a delicious dinner, a
guaranteed-seating section for the
Candlelight Processional, and
pre-arranged fireworks viewing.
For more information, or to make dinner
reservations: 407.WDW.DINE
(407.939.3463)
CELEBRITY NARRATORS:
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11/27-11/29 - Isabella Rossellini -
NEW!
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11/30-12/02 - John O'Hurley
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12/03-12/05 - Steven Curtis Chapman
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12/06-12/08 - Anika Noni Rose -
NEW!
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12/09-12/11 - Andy Garcia
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12/12-12/14 - Vanesa Williams -
NEW!
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12/15-12/17 - Abigail Breslin
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12/18-12/20 - Whoopi Goldberg -
NEW!
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12/21-12/23 - Brian Dennehy
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12/24-12/26 - Edward James Olmos
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12/27-12/30 - Angela Bassett &
Courtney B. Vance
Lunch and Dinner Packages include
priority seating at the restaurant of
your choice with a 3-course meal, family
style dinner, or unlimited buffet - in
accordance with the usual style of
service at the restaurant selected.
Price also includes access to the
Guaranteed-Seating Section at a
time-specific performance of The
Candlelight Processional, and access to
a special IllumiNations viewing
location:
Tier 1:
The Garden Grill / Land
Pavilion (no lunch seating)
Biergarten Restaurant /
Germany
Adults: $32.99
lunch $44.99 dinner
Children: $17.99 lunch
$22.99 dinner
Tier 2:
San Angel Inn / Mexico
Nine Dragons / China
Restaurant Marrakesh / Morocco
Rose & Crown / United
Kingdom
Adults: $38.99
lunch $44.99 dinner
Children: $12.99 lunch
$14.99 dinner
Tier 3
Chefs de France / France
Tutto Italia / Italy
Le Cellier Steakhouse / Canada
Teppan Edo / Japan
Coral Reef / Future World - adjacent
to Nemo
Adults: $51.99
lunch $59.99 dinner
Children: $13.99 lunch
$15.99 dinner
Candlelight Dinner Packages do not
include Park admission
New This Year - All dining packages now
include access to special viewing area
for IllumiNations
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Seth Rudetsky to Teach Master Class in
NYC |
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The Amaaaaahzing Seth Rudetsky will
teach his master class in the Big Apple
this month. "This is a class I've been
teaching around the country," explains
the Broadway Conductor and Celebrity
Vocal Coach. "Here are some of the
things I will address with each and
every Master Class participant:"
Get the right cut of the song you're
auditioning with...
stop singing the wrong 16 bars!
Stop hating the song you're
auditioning with.
So many people have a signature song
but no longer enjoy singing it.
Seth helps people learn to love
their song.
These questions are also answered:
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Where do I look when I audition?
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How do I end this song?
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What do I think about when I'm
singing?
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What should I do with my
body/hands?
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Can I sing this song at an audition
for (fill in the blank)?
EVERY PERSON GETS INDIVIDUAL
ATTENTION
Come learn to love auditioning
Seth Rudetsky's
Master Class
In Auditioning for Musical Roles
NYC
November 15, 2009
10:30 AM - 1:30 PM
Don't Tell Mama
343 W. 46th Street
New York, NY
Fee: $100 Payable in advance
Then you MUST log onto Seth's Pay Pal
page and make advance payment:
You MUST Bring Sheet Music (audition
songs) and a recording device.
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Uber-Talented PH Mainstay & Friend
Celebrates His Own Aging |
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People in the know know to arrive during
the first hour if you want to take
advantage of the complimentary homemade
food that the Sunday regulars take turns
preparing each week.
Since this Sunday is Kelly's Birthday
Party, we at the WANZeGRAM encourage
others to bring a little somethin',
somethin' nibbly to share with others.
Despite having another Birthday bash to
attend on Sunday, Wanzie
wouldn't miss spending at least an hour
or two early in the party with Kelly,
who has been Orlando's premiere Gay Bar
pianist for more years than he would
likely care to admit, and who has done
so much to help others look and sound
good over the years. Plus, he's just a
great guy, a loyal friend, and a
familiar handsome face to so many, who
also just loves playing for the gay and
gay-friendly audience at the PH.
Even if you have other Sunday
plans - please plan to
JOIN WANZIE
By dropping by the PH and
offering your birthday wishes to an
Orlando Institution -
KELLY RICHARDS!
Come. Sing. Eat. Sing. Party.
Sing. Drink. Sing.
Sunday, November 15
1-5 PM
Footlight Lounge
DID YOU KNOW?
 Kelly
Richards was born in Decatur,
Indiana where he started playing piano
at four and a half years of age. Kelly
started The Indiana School Of Music in
1980, and spent the next five years
pursuing and obtaining a degree in music
education. Upon graduation Kelly was
retained as a staff pianist/vocalist for
all of the Walt Disney World parks and
resorts. He has performed at the
Hollywood Brown Derby at
Disney/Hollywood Studios, The Living
Seas at EPCOT, Magic Music Days at the
Magic Kingdom, the Grand Floridian
Hotel, Coronado Springs Hotel, and at
Disney's Yacht & Beach Club Resorts. He
has also performed at Sea World, among
other area attractions and resort
hotels. Kelly has recorded two CD's, and
has played for many celebrities
includingPaula Zahn, Steve Guttenburg,
John Travolta, Billy Joel, Christi
Brinkley, Ann Miller, and many more.
Kelly Richards currently appears nightly
at the Omni Orlando Resort at Champions'
Gate as well as continuing to host the
weekly sing-a-long piano party every
Sunday early-afternoon at the Parliament
House:
EXPANDED HOURS FOR KELLY'S PARTY THIS
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 15:
1 PM - 5 PM
From all of us at the WANZeGRAM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
KELLY
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Festival of the Trees Opens / Complete
Schedule |
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Festival of Trees is Central Florida's
premier annual holiday event
orchestrated by the Council of 101 to
benefit the Orlando Museum of Art. Since
1986, the event provides the community
with a truly complete holiday
experience. The museum is transformed
into a winter wonderland for nine days
each November. Visitors stroll through
rooms of dazzling decorated trees,
wreaths, and vignettes, (created by area
designers and artists,) which are
available for purchase.
Also on display are a Gingerbread
Village, Toyland Town, and Christmas
Village, which are great for the young
and the young at heart. Guests may shop
till their heart's content at the
Holiday Boutique and Holiday Garden, or
take a break and enjoy some
entertainment provided by local area
choirs, schools, dance groups,
orchestras, a caroling company, a ballet
company, and individual performers.
Lunch and refreshments are available at
the Festival Café' created especially
for this event
Friday, November 13 - Sunday,
November 22
Orlando Museum of Art
10 AM - 5 PM
Extended-Hours Days:
Thursday, November 19
&
Saturday, November21
10 AM - 8 PM
General Admission:
Adults $10 / Children $6
On-site parking $5.
Shuttle service provided from Magruder
Eye Institute and Florida Hospital Alden
St Garage on Weekends only
For further details, contact the Council
of 101 Office at
407 896 4231, x254 or e-mail
councilof101@aol.com
For individual advance ticket sales, log
onto omart.org
2009 FESTIVAL OF
TREES
SPECIAL EVENTS & PRICING:
Reindeer Romp - Wednesday,
November 18
A wonderful holiday party for the entire
family complete with entertainers, face
painters, and a chance to get your
holiday photo with Santa. Light snacks
6:30 PM - 8:30 PM
$12
($7 valet parking)
Holiday Jazz Stroll- Friday,
November 20
Enjoy live jazz music and
entertainment provided by Jeff Rupert &
Dirty Martini, along with great Hors
d'oeuvres.
7 PM-10 PM
$35
($7 valet parking)
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Now Playing:
PH Sunday Cabaret Series |
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Make plans now to see
"Orlando's Favorite Pancake Hostess"
RESERVATIONS: 407.540.0317
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Now on Sale
in our Box Office! |
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We've Got
Mail! |
Dear Trish:
I would prefer to have a
conversation with you in person and
not to have "We've Got Mail" as my
only option. Apparently you don't
feel the same. I suspect you do not
even exist. That has been my
experience most often when dealing
with the on-going shenanigans of a
particular "out" local elected
official. I requested your contact
information from the WANZeGRAM staff
and was told that they, as a
publically stated policy, do not
share e-mail addresses without
permission. I was, however, invited
to contact you instead through a
Letter to the Editor of The
WANZeGRAM.
So here goes -
Who are you and why do you try to
diminish acts of charity in our
community?
Call me! We need to do lunch and
catch you up on what's been going on
in this community for the last two
decades. Instead of making
inflammatory statements, as you did
in last week's WANZeGRAM, insulting
not only me ("...your idiot readers
like Jeff Horn...") but the entire
group of WANZeGRAM subscribers
regarding my and Michael
Wanzie's community service ("...what
have YOU two ever done for this
community? ..."). Instead of putting
your ignorance on display, I
suggest you might want to try
"googling" first. I'm sure your
friends and conversation-mates would
appreciate the more enlightened
conversation.
To provide a partial answer to your
question, which you apparently had
no sincere interest in knowing the
answer to in the first place -
JEFF HORN:
Co-Founder (w/ Terry Deischer),
Delta Youth Alliance (1990)
Founder, Orange Blossom
Tennis Association (1992)
Co-Founder (w/ Daisy Lynum),
Genesis Community Program
(1994)
Producer, Miss OBTA Pageant
Fundraiser (1997- Present)
12-year board member & 7-term
President, St. Francis House
Homeless Shelter
Founding Member, United
States Tennis Association Florida
Section Multi-Cultural Participation
Committee.
I have donated over 400
hours a year to local community
service for the last 19 years. I
wish I could do more. I hope to.
My volunteer and
community-building efforts pale
in comparison to Michael
Wanzie's. It was at a public
event at Mayor Carl Langford
Park over 20 years ago that I
first heard Michael speak, and
he encouraged those of us in the
audience to participate in our
community. I was inspired by
his words and his willingness to
be "out" and "public," and I
decided that very day that
I wanted to do more.
Since you, Trish Ireland, choose
to publicly insult Michael
Wanzie and me on the topic of
community service, I thought I
should "Google" you to find out
what role you've taken in
our community. Not one item
came up with your name and
"Orlando." Amazing!
Even though we've never met, and
you've apparently done no
research, you wrote a public
letter denigrating Wanzie and me
and the WANZeGRAM
subscribers, and questioning our
contributions. According to my
Google search you, Trish
Ireland, are AWOL and
invisible.
I guess we won't be doing
lunch.
I end where I began - Trish
Ireland - Who are you and why do
you try to diminish acts of
charity in our
community?
-- Jeff Horn
We at the WANZeGRAM are always
just as pleased as punch to
receive, post, and answer our
mail in this public forum. But
it takes two to play! Send your
email to WANZIE!
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Short Takes:
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"If you really want to help the
American theater, don't be an
actress, dahling. Be an
audience."
- Tallulah
Bankhead
Submit YOUR Short Take directly to
WANZIE at
michael@wanzie.com.Be sure to type
"Short Take" in the subject line. Short
Takes submissions must be received no
later than midnight on each Tuesday, for
inclusion in the following Friday GRAM.
A strict limit of 30 words maximum is
imposed. You must provide your first and
last name, which will be printed
following your submission. Your name
will not figure into your word count.
All postings will be at the sole
discretion of the management team at the
lovely WANZIE.com World Headquarters,
with offices inconveniently located in
Melbourne, and Lake Mary, Florida. |
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My Two Cents:
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A SOUTHREN PERSPECTIVE ON THE
"NO WHITE AFTER LABOR DAY" RULE and THE
FASHION SENSE OF PALM BEACH KEN and MR.
STEVE OF BEL AIR
By Dr. Channing Bolick
That Palm Beach Ken Doll...has been the
endless butt of many jokes at my house
this week.
With regards to the issue raised as a
result of a recent article in the
WANZeGRAM with regards to NOT wearing
white after Labor Day, I decided to
weigh in with My Two Cents on the
subject:
The subject of wearing white after Labor
Day or not reminds me of my mother's
Charleston Society viewpoint; in the
South it is not nearly as important if
one chooses to wear white after Labor
Day, as is WHERE one might choose to
wear white after Labor Day. For
example: white after Labor Day at the
Yacht Club is fine, but wear the same
outfit to the opera and it is considered
an eyesore.
However, seersucker does not qualify for
this exception. Wearing seersucker
ANYWHERE after Labor Day will generate
stares, pointing, and even loud laughter
in some cases. In Charleston Society
there are few things funnier than to
observe some fool in a seersucker suit
in January walking down King Street. And
funnier still is the seersucker-wearer
being oblivious to the fact that 8 out
of every 10 people he passes on the
street are literally stopping, turning
around, and staring at the fashion
rule-breaker. I've even heard tales of
Charleston employers sending guys home
from work for wearing seersucker after
Labor Day.
When I was at boarding school I had to
take a European & American
Etiquette class. The teacher hated me,
so I was assigned to write this
2,000-word paper on "Etiquette in the
Elizabethan Period." After pouring
through over 20 books to gather enough
material for the paper, I found this
little known rule for etiquette:
"He who knows all the
rules of etiquette is free to bend
or in some cases break them at will
as circumstance dictates. It is a
common flaw of the Nouveau Riche and
the pretentious to rigidly adhere to
a rule of etiquette where
circumstance would indicate a
different course."
This information not only helped with my
paper but also ended up being of great
use to me handling certain people later
in life.
I delved further into the No White After
Labor Day rule as part of my quest for
proper etiquette, and if memory serves
me well, I recall the rule actually
started with dress shoes, and likely
originated in New England Society, and
till this day the rule certainly applies
more in the North than in the South,
especially in the New Port scene where
people will shut down their summer home
and leave all (or most) of their summer
clothes there. So the chances of pulling
something white out of your closet in
your winter residence would be slim. The
nouveau riche adopted this code to fit
in better with high society as wearing
white after Labor Day could be a
tell-tale-sign you were too poor to own
a winter residence! (And
who would want to advertise that
indignity?)
The No White After Labor Day rule is
also uniquely American as most other
counties that observe Labor Day do so in
May.
So in the end, if Palm Beach Ken is on a
beach in 85 degree weather in January
wearing white after Labor Day that
would be perfectly fine, and I'm
certain the fashion forward Mr. Steve of
Bel Air would have both the good sense
and the confidence to wear white as
circumstance might dictate, regardless
of the proximity of Labor Day.
 Dr.
Channing Bolick has a Bachelor
of Science degree from the USC, a
Doctorate of Chiropractic from Palmer
College (where Chiropractic was
founded). He is the long-time Alumni
President of Delta Delta Pi Professional
Chiropractic Fraternity. In 1999 Dr.
Bolick obtained a Fellowship degree in
Acupuncture from the International
Academy of Medical Acupuncture. His
book, SIDE EFFECTS, was published in
2008. He resides, and runs his practice,
in Maitland, Florida where he is an
active member of the Rotary Club. He is
the chief practitioner/owner of
The Bolick Clinic of Chiropractic
Wellness located on Horatio
Ave./Howell Branch Rd. one block east of
Orlando Ave. (Hwy 17/92) in Downtown
Maitland. Apparently the good doctor is
also a graduate of a certain boarding
school where he garnered special
knowledge in the arena of etiquette as
it applies to fashion.
Submit YOUR TWO CENTS:
My Two Cents submissions must be
received no later than midnight on each
Monday for possible inclusion in the
next Friday GRAM. A strict limit of 350
words will be imposed. Please submit
your column directly to WANZIE at michael@wanzie.com
and kindly type "My Two Cents" in the
subject line.
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THEATER - CRIMES
OF THE HEART
The Garden Theatre
presents the Beth
Marshall Presents
production of CRIMES OF
THE HEART. In Beth
Henley's Pulitzer
Prize-winning play,
three young Mississippi
sisters are betrayed by
their passions when they
reunite after the
youngest sister is
arrested for shooting
her husband. Though it
sounds like an intense
drama, CRIMES finds
plenty of room for
irreverence, zany humor,
and a big heart, making
it a story about family
that everyone can relate
to.
This production includes
actors Jason Horne,
Meggin Weaver, Britni
Leslie, and William
Hagaman; and even Beth
Marshall herself makes a
stage appearance in this
production.
The Garden Theatre and
Beth Marshall Presents
will offer
Post-Performance
Talk-Backs on Sunday,
November 15, and Sunday,
November 22 immediately
following the end of the
show. These events will
serve as an opportunity
to ask questions
directly to the cast and
crew of the performance.
A representative from
Harbor House will give
context to the topic of
domestic violence in the
play.
CRIMES OF THE HEART
November 13 - 29
Fridays and Saturdays at
8 PM
Sundays at 2 PM
Industry Night: Monday,
November 16 at 8 PM
Garden Theatre
160 West Plant Street
Winter Garden, FL
THEATER - ASSASSINS
Seminole State College's
production of the Stephen
Sondheim musical, ASSASSINS,
directed by John DiDonna.
Assassins is a darkly comic
musical, which features nine
individuals who have
attempted, successfully or
unsuccessfully, to
assassinate an American
president. The musical
explores their personalities
and motivations in a
revue-style format. Society
may deem them insane,
history may regard them as
mere footnotes, but they are
citizens of America,
nonetheless; and their views
shape the nature of American
society as much as their
victims.
"Everybody's got the
right...to their dreams"
ASSASSINS
Directed by
John DiDonna
Musical Direction by
Don Hopkinson
Choreography by
Casey Saxon
November 13 -
November 22
Thursday, Friday, and
Saturday Nights at 7:30 PM
Sundays at 2 PM
Seminole State
College
(Sanford/Lake Mary Campus)
Building G
100 Weldon
Boulevard
Sanford, FL 32773
Reservations strongly
recommended:
S.S.C. Box Office:
1-800-947-5096
COMEDY - SLEUTH'S
SIZZLING COMEDY
If you like "Whose Line Is It
Anyway?" then you'll love the
family at Mama's
Place! on Friday
evenings at Sleuth's in Orlando.
Interact with outrageous
characters. See hysterical
improvised comedy based on
audience suggestions.
Participate in interactive game
shows. You become part of the
fun as a team of some of the
funniest performers in Orlando
creates the fun before your very
eyes! (Adult content and
language, for mature audiences.)
On Saturday nights the stage is
set for Stand-Up
Comedy Spotlight!
Sleuth's invites youto see the
best in Central Florida stand-up
talent. Hosted by Miller Lite
Mic Night competition
winnerKevin White. Comics appear
courtesy of the Best Of British
Pub open mic nights. Come and
laugh with the hilarious
stand-up stars of
tomorrow! (Adult content and
language, for mature audiences.)
Sizzling Comedy
Mama's Place! On
Fridays
Stand-Up Spotlight on Saturdays
10 PM
Sleuths Mystery Dinner
Theatre
8267 International Drive
Orlando, FL 32819
$10
Full bar and light bites
available for purchase
(Comedy series shows are not
dinner theater presentations.)
Stand-Up Spotlight shows are
only $5 with theme park/service
industry ID.
Reservations (407)
363-1985
THEATER -
JEKYLL & HYDE
The Greater
Orlando Actors Theatre production opens
Friday, October 30th, but they are
offering their early ticket buyers a
special discount.
Between now and opening night, all you
have to do is enter the coupon code
EARLYSALE in your shopping cart at
http://www.goatgroup.com/ . Just add
the tickets to your cart and enter the
code where it says "Enter Promotional
Code" and you will receive a $5 discount
on the regular adult ticket price.
The discount is good on all regular
adult tickets, including the Saturday,
October 31st Halloween Fundraiser.
Regular tickets for that event, normally
$30, include that evening's performance
of Jekyll and Hyde as well as the
post-show party, food, silent auction,
raffles, and cabaret. With EARLYSALE,
tickets for the Halloween Ball are only
$25.
Remember, this special coupon expires
when the show opens! Get your tickets
now!
JEKYLL AND HYDE: THE
MUSICAL
By Steve Cuden and Frank
Wildhorn
Directed by Paul Castaneda
Musical Direction by Don
Hopkinson
October 30 - November 27, 2009
Fridays/Saturdays 8 pm - Sundays 7 pm
Monday, November 9th Industry Night Show
8 pm
Greater Orlando Actors Theatre -
GOAT
669 Cherry Street, Winter Park, FL 32789
Off Fairbanks between I-4 and 17/92
Call 407.872.8451
For show overview and more information:
http://www.goatgroup.com/
TRAVEL - JOIN
WANZIE/WORLD'S LARGEST CRUISE SHIP
The departure date
for the seven-night Eastern-Carribean
Itinerary cruise sailing from the port
of Ft. Lauderdale is April 24, 2010.
Cruise with Wanzie and other WANZeGRAM
subscribers aboard what is soon to be
the largest cruise ship in the world -
Royal Caribbean's OASIS OF THE SEAS. The
time to book is right now. Only a $250
deposit is required at this time.
For complete information and lots of
great pictures of the ship, visit the
CRUISE WITH WANZIE page on the
Wanzie.com website:
http://www.wanzie.com/cruise.html
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Coming
Attractions: |
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A List of Coming and Ongoing
Attractions, which are not featured
elsewhere in your current WANZeGRAM
Nov. 28
Wanzie's STAR STUDED A CHRISTMAS CAROL
- Footlight Theatre
Dec. 5. ORLANDO GAY CHORUS HOLIDAY
CONCERT
ONGOING
Nov. 10 OSBOURNE FAMILY LIGHTS
- Disney/Hollywood Studios
Nov. 27 CANDLELIGHT
PROCESSIONAL - Epcot
Nov. 27 A CHRISTMAS CAROL -
Theatre Downtown
Nov. 28 RENE' BRAY: SWEET and
SASSY - Sleuth's
Through Nov. 30 - DIANA The
People's Princess - Downtown
Disney
Dec. 1 RENT - Broadway at
Carr PAC
Through Jan. 3 - TATIANA'S
SHOWBOAT JUBILEE - Magic Kingdom
Wednesdays - BEACH BLANKET BINGO
- PH
Sundays - BRUNCH - Funky Monkey
Wine Company
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A Note From Wanzie:
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Heeeelp!
I have managed to get myself involved in
something called "Teach-In Day" at a
Seminole County Middle School this
coming Tuesday.
When I was originally asked if I would
volunteer my time to address a class of
Theater and Television Production
students, I agreed to do so thinking I
was going to do so at a high school.
Now I am faced with the horrifying
realization that I will be dealing with
11 - 13 year-olds!
Anyone who knows me knows that as a
general rule I don't particularly care
for children. Especially in groups!
I had given real consideration to
showing up in my Mother Superior
costume, from Dragness o God, carrying a
ruler, just to try and command some
attention and instill fear. Something
along the lines of -
I gave up on the nun idea and quickly
overcame my anxiety once it was
explained to me that a condition of the
volunteer teach-in program required I
undergo a background check. "Surely they
would find out things about me that
would convince them I should not be
allowed on campus," I thought to myself.
I was certain the invitation to speak to
the kids would be rescinded.
But either I passed the background
check, or they just didn't bother to do
the background check, or they are so
desperate for volunteers they just
didn't care how many times I've been
cited by the FCC for blurting out
obscenities on the public airways during
"family friendly" time, because the next
thing I heard from the school people was
in reference to my lunch-time meal
preferences.
Not only am I now completely on the hook
to do this thing, but it has just been
disclosed to me that I have to present
whatever the f*ck it is I'm going to
present six times over, to six separate
classes of mostly pre-pubescent
hooligans.
Worse than that is the nagging question
as to what exactly are my credentials or
my life examples that these kids can
learn from and follow?
I'm a 52 year-old child-despising
playwright who calls Bingo on the side
to make ends meet, and I'm a high school
drop out to boot! What were these people
thinking?
What was I thinking?
Furthermore, I've never taken an acting
class or a playwriting class in my life,
so I have no basis upon which to draw
when it comes to the practical
application of instructing anyone else
on how they might accomplish either.
Also it's not like I have a show on
Broadway, or am acting at an Equity
theater, so asking me to speak on how to
be successful in these fields is a
little like asking Mehmet Ali Agca to
give a talk on how to kill a Pope and
get away with it. (For those of you too
young to know - Agca was not successful
in his attempt to kill Pope John Paul
II, and was immediately apprehended,
with the gun still in his hand, and
arrested for attempting to do so.)
I'm due to participate in this "Teach-In
Day" on Tuesday. Like less than four
days from now. And I have to be there at
7:30 AM! Again...What is wrong with
these people? I'm often enjoying a
nightcap at 7:30 AM, for chrissake!
So - And I ask this in earnest and with
all sincerity - if there is anyone out
there who can offer me advice of any
kind, or who might be able to suggest
exercises or activities I might
incorporate into my non-existent
presentation, and/or how to gear my
remarks/experiences to this unholy age
group, your input would be greatly
appreciated; not only by myself, but
also, I'm sure, by the misguided
individuals who thought that inviting me
to do this was, in anyway, a good idea
in the first place.
If nobody calls or writes with some
practical suggestions as to how it is I
am to handle this, I might very well opt
to call in a bomb threat to the school
in question on Tuesday.
I've said it before and I'll say it
again:
Heeeelp!
I'm WANZIE and That's All I Wrote!
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